angel of mine

Angel doing his thing

This is Angel. Seven days a week from 1-9pm Angel sets up shop at this intersection, a couple blocks away from our housing site, to sell candy. Whenever i was walking home i would always hope to see him there and i definitely took a number of my groups to buy candy from him. I don't wanna brag or anything, but i was probably his best advertiser.

Anyway, the hardest thing about leaving New York for me was leaving Angel. I had seen him working at his intersection a couple times before i finally went up to talk to him. It was kind of hard to understand him but something about him kept drawing me to him. So after that whenever i saw him out there i would make it a point to stop by and chat a little. He's 22 years old. Older than me, which made him laugh when he found that out. He's got two younger brothers. And he lives at home. He's been selling candy, from costco, at this intersection since he was 18. He hates selling candy. He doesn't like doing it but he needs money. This actually caught me off guard. Because every time i've seen him he's always smiled real big and been real friendly.

The last day i saw him before i came home i told him this was probably the last time i would see him before i left. He told me he was going to miss me. And that if i ever came back to NY that he would be there. He gave me a hug and thanked me for everything that i had done, and for all the candy i'd bought from him (though no more than $10 worth of candy i'm sure). I feel weird talking about this; i don't want to portray the idea that i think i made such a huge difference, but i know that Angel really loved me. And that when he told me he was going to miss me and when he thanked me for everything, that he was being completely sincere. Did i really do as much for him as he thanks me for? i doubt it. All i did was stop by with him every now and again. Yet i believe his sincerity.

After this summer i really believe that it takes so little for us to really make a difference. Add up the amount of time time i spent with Angel and it was probably less than an hour, a couple hours tops, yet look at his gratitude. Even with the youth groups that came in. There were so many times when i just didn't try, so many times i was tired, or that i felt like i wouldn't be able to connect with certain kids. Yet God was huge. Lives were change. Every time i got to hear one of my students tell me how this week had been life changing for them made my heart skip a beat. It also humbled me greatly. Because even when i didn't work to try and touch the lives of these kids, God did.

I'm going to miss Angel so much. By the end of the summer we were getting to know each other better. The last few conversations we had were so much fun. We shared about our lives and laughed together. I never got to do anything for him besides buying his candy. I invited him to one of our praise nights and to go get dinner but both times he said he couldn't because he had to work. Walking away from him was so hard because realistically i knew i would never get to see him again. Yet at the same time i also walk away feeling satisfied. Satisfied because i know that i truly tried to show him love and because he showed me that somehow through me he had indeed received the love he deserved. And though i still feel as if i hadn't done enough for him, i trust that though i am no longer there, God will continue to take care of this young man, doing more for him than i could ever know.